Rosaline
Dear Diary,
Oh my gosh. Today was literally the worst day ever. Romeo Montague, the guy who literally will not get over me, showed up at my house at like, 2 am. He is honestly so annoying. He showed up and started throwing pebbles at my window. At first, I thought it was the hot bartender at the Ye Old Balloon Shop. But then I looked out the window and saw Romeo and I was like “Oh my gosh, Romeo, like, go away. I don’t love you”. Then he was like “but Rosaline I love you with all my heart, please don’t do this to me. Then I was like “I honestly can’t even. Go talk to your friend Benropilo”. Then he was like “His name is Benvolio”. And I was like “Romeo I don’t even care. If you leave my yard right now, I will literally call the guards on you and they will literally beat you up.” He left after that. But he did it really slow and he was crying. Oh my gosh I can’t even right now. After that, I went back to bed. When I woke up, I was still tired because stupid Romeo woke me up. I was like “oh my god I can’t even right now”. So I got my servant to go down to the Ye old Starbuckeus and get me a lamb fluff ye where art thou double espresso coffee. It was so good. Like oh. My. Gosh. I had to let my friend know, so I got my carrier pigeons and sent them to Mary, Lucille, Carline, Madison, and Elizabeth. I let them know how good the espresso was. I’m still waiting for them to answer me. They need to switch over to Ye Sprint network because they’re so slow.
Oh my gosh. Today was literally the worst day ever. Romeo Montague, the guy who literally will not get over me, showed up at my house at like, 2 am. He is honestly so annoying. He showed up and started throwing pebbles at my window. At first, I thought it was the hot bartender at the Ye Old Balloon Shop. But then I looked out the window and saw Romeo and I was like “Oh my gosh, Romeo, like, go away. I don’t love you”. Then he was like “but Rosaline I love you with all my heart, please don’t do this to me. Then I was like “I honestly can’t even. Go talk to your friend Benropilo”. Then he was like “His name is Benvolio”. And I was like “Romeo I don’t even care. If you leave my yard right now, I will literally call the guards on you and they will literally beat you up.” He left after that. But he did it really slow and he was crying. Oh my gosh I can’t even right now. After that, I went back to bed. When I woke up, I was still tired because stupid Romeo woke me up. I was like “oh my god I can’t even right now”. So I got my servant to go down to the Ye old Starbuckeus and get me a lamb fluff ye where art thou double espresso coffee. It was so good. Like oh. My. Gosh. I had to let my friend know, so I got my carrier pigeons and sent them to Mary, Lucille, Carline, Madison, and Elizabeth. I let them know how good the espresso was. I’m still waiting for them to answer me. They need to switch over to Ye Sprint network because they’re so slow.